i knew i didn't start my day well on Sunday. I knew what slipped from my mouth. i erred.
ya...that's goes to show how human i am.
amidst so much buzz, gladful and thankful for those who are standing by, garnering support. thanks evan. shall desist. thanks juan for not pushing. and esp for today, as i deliberate set time aside to hang out with enochui and chek... i thought i gained insight and knowledge that are invaluable.
thanks enochui for the time, energy, patience and the empathetic attitude towards our sharing. thanks dear for being who u are, for complementing me... let's jiayou tog in every aspect of our lives.
PSALM 63 1 O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water. 2 I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory.
3 Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.
4 I will praise you as long as I live, and in your name I will lift up my hands.
5 My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise you.
6 On my bed I remember you; I think of you through the watches of the night.
7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
8 My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me.
the amount of stress can be so indescribable at time. esp when the datelines come crushing and the harsh reality that time is really not on my side. the cruelty of my honours year is that i'm not the only one facing this tremendous amount of work which creates a choking sensation.
some of them are showing signs of crack; some have cried a bucket; some whose pressure are building and it's only a matter b4 it blows.
the temptation of sleeping in, skipping useless seminars. arriving late for seminars is beginning to be a norm for me. sigh, how pathetic. sometimes i really feel like letting it go, and like a free market, things may regulate itself.
insurmountable difficulties esp with a brain that process slower than i want it to be. have i reached my limits?
BUT when i listen to worship songs like, it's as though i'm lifted from my worries. even reading my bible is so refreshing. but the thing is that i touch my notes, assignments more than i touch my bible.
I prayed and i received the assurance but God help me! my human flesh is weak and my mind strays into the path where doubts, fear thrives and manifest; where light is seen at the far end. Weekly cell group meetings maybe robbed and i disgust with the fact that i even have to consider that option.
What makes me alive now is my weekends, and the intangible love in the relationships i have with God and the ppl around. will they be strong enough to see me thru...
I'm sure they will. tell me they will. let me be convinced. I have Christ, He who has overcome the world and even death. no amount of failures and stress can ever pluck me from His hand, cos i am His and He is mine...here in the power of Christ I stand.
